Helping toddlers talk & play

Harvard’s Center on the Developing Child calls it serve and return: responsive, back-and-forth exchanges between a young child and a caring adult. A point, a babble or a look is a serve. Your smile, words or answer is the return.

By 15 months, most children look at a familiar object when you name it. By 18 months, most can follow a one-step direction without gestures, like “Give it to me.”

By 1 year, most babies wave bye-bye, and by 15 months most point to ask for something or get help. By 2, most use more gestures than waving and pointing, like blowing a kiss or nodding yes.

A hearing problem can affect speech and language development. That’s why a hearing test is often one of the first steps if talking seems slow.

Most children

• Call a parent “mama,” “dada” or another special name
• Play games like pat-a-cake
• Understand “no” (pause briefly or stop)
• Wave bye-bye

Most children

• Follow directions given with both a gesture and words
• Look at a familiar object when you name it
• Point to ask for something or to get help
• Try to say one or two words besides “mama” or “dada,” like “ba” for ball

Most children

• Follow one-step directions without gestures
• Look at a few pages in a book with you
• Point to show you something interesting
• Try to say three or more words besides “mama” or “dada”

Most children

• Point to at least two body parts when asked
• Point to things in a book when you ask, like “Where is the bear?”
• Say at least two words together, like “More milk”
• Use more gestures than waving and pointing

The AAP notes many 2-year-olds have a fast-growing vocabulary of 50 or more words.

Most children

• Ask “who,” “what,” “where” or “why” questions
• Say their first name when asked
• Say what’s happening in a picture, like “running” or “eating”
• Talk with you using at least two back-and-forth exchanges
• Talk well enough for others to understand, most of the time

The CDC suggests describing daily routines, so your child hears words linked to actions, and naming things you see outside, like trucks or birds.

When your child points at something, name it and wait a few seconds to see if they make a sound before you hand it over. In songs, pause before a familiar word and see if they fill it in.

The CDC suggests teaching more words by adding to the words your child says. As they grow, speak in slightly longer sentences than theirs, using real words.

Try saying

• Child: “Car!” You: “A red car!”
• Child: “More!” You: “More banana, please.”
• Child: “Doggy run.” You: “The doggy is running fast!”

If your child says a word unclearly, say the correct word back in a full phrase, like “Yes, you want more banana.” This helps them hear how words sound, even before they can say them clearly.

Not so helpful: “No, say it properly,” or making them repeat it before they get the thing. That can make talking feel like a test.

The CDC suggests talking with your child face to face and getting down to their eye level when you can.

Ask simple questions about what’s around them. By 3, try questions about pictures and what might happen next, and ask for more details after they answer.

With young toddlers, it’s fine to mostly describe the pictures. Board books with textures or flaps are great at this age.

Children enjoy repetition. The CDC suggests reading a new book after a favourite one, so new ideas come alongside familiar ones.

A calm bedtime routine with one or two books is a simple daily habit. The AAP suggests making books part of the bedtime routine.

Make a simple picture book of family members and pets and name them together. The AAP also suggests books that reflect different cultures, to talk about belonging and identity.

For 2-year-olds, the AAP suggests short books that invite touching, pointing, naming or repeating phrases.

The CDC suggests child-led play: at least 5 to 15 minutes a day, starting with 5 and adding more over time. Follow your child’s ideas, copy and describe what they’re doing, and keep questions and directions to a minimum.

The CDC suggests encouraging pretend play, like a doll and blanket or grown-up clothes for dress-up. Try “pretend talking” with a stuffed animal and see if your child copies you or talks back.

Rolling a ball back and forth, building towers and knocking them down, and simple games where you both have a part teach the rhythm of conversation.

Sing familiar songs with hand motions. Songs about body parts help, especially if you pause and let your child fill in the word.

Narrate as you blow bubbles for them to pop. Name each puzzle piece as it goes in. At 3, try counting games and games about opposites, like big and small or fast and slow.

Two-year-olds usually play side by side and need help sharing. By 3, most notice other children and join them to play.

The AAP recommends avoiding screen media other than video chatting for children under 18 months. Video calls with grandparents and family are relationship time.

If you introduce digital media, the AAP suggests choosing high-quality programs and watching with your child, rather than letting them watch alone.

The World Health Organization advises no more than 1 hour a day of sitting screen time for ages 2 to 4, and says less is better.

The AAP’s newest guidance focuses less on exact hours and more on quality, watching together, and screen-free times like meals and bedtime. The “Screen time for kids & teens: limits that work” guide has more.

If your child watches a show or listens to an audiobook, the AAP suggests back-and-forth talk about it, and helping them connect what they saw to the world around them.

A child learning two languages should know about the same total number of words as a child learning one. For example, 25 English words and 25 Spanish words is like 50 words in one language.

Mixing words or grammar from two languages in one sentence is common and normal. Usually by age 3, children who speak more than one language can keep them apart.

The AAP advises families not to stop using their home language when a child starts school. You won’t confuse your child or set them back.

Talk, read and sing in the language you’re most comfortable with. Rich, warm talk in any language builds your child’s brain.

A true language delay shows up in all the languages a child uses. A speech-language pathologist can assess in your child’s home language or with an interpreter.

Speech-language specialists often use fewer than 50 words and no two-word phrases by 24 months as a sign of late language. Late talkers usually understand a lot and are on track in other areas.

About 50 to 70% of late talkers catch up with their peers by late preschool or school age. Simple speech delays are sometimes temporary, and some children need a speech-language therapist.

Late talking is more common in boys, in children with a family history of late talking, in twins, and in children born early or small.

None of this means a parent or caregiver did something wrong.

The CDC sets milestones at ages most children reach them, so that missing one prompts a check rather than “wait and see.” The CDC’s advice is simple: don’t wait, because acting early can make a real difference.

Late talking can sometimes go along with hearing loss, a wider developmental delay, autism, or a learning difference that shows up later.

Early intervention is funded by federal and state governments, and no diagnosis is needed. Children who qualify get an Individualized Family Service Plan (IFSP) until age 3.

From age 3, the local public school system can evaluate and, if eligible, offer an Individualized Education Program (IEP).

If you still have concerns, the AAP says you can ask for a re-evaluation or a referral for more testing. You know your child best.

In many countries, your family doctor, pediatrician or child health nurse can arrange a hearing check and a referral to speech and language services.

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