Children of immigrants

A 2024 review of 53 studies found that the link between acculturation stress and mental health held for both first- and second-generation young people.

Sources of stress it found

• Family duties
• Gaps between how fast parents and children adapt
• Language barriers
• Not knowing where you fit (identity stress)
• Racism and religious stereotypes

The APA reports that the harm of anti-immigrant attitudes can pass to children who were born as citizens. Being asked where you are “really” from can make you feel like a guest in your own country.

The APA says research supports blending cultures: people who connect with both their heritage culture and the wider culture tend to have better wellbeing than people who live in only one.

Research on these children finds strengths like open-mindedness toward other cultures and interest in languages.

• Adapting to new places
• Making friends with people from many backgrounds
• Seeing more than one side of a story

The same research finds challenges: grieving friends and places after each move, and often feeling most at home with others who grew up the same way.

Many children of immigrants say the idea fits them too, even if they never moved. Others prefer different words. You get to choose what describes you.

Because feelings about brokering matter so much, many young people who feel proud and appreciated cope well. Being thanked and supported makes a difference.

Under U.S. rules, health programs that get federal money from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services should not rely on a child to interpret, except briefly in an emergency while they find a qualified interpreter.

• Ask for help with homework or rest time when you have a lot to translate
• Help family find English classes or community helpers
• Name the jobs you are okay doing
• Tell a trusted adult if it feels too heavy

Being the one who understands the system can make you feel needed and capable. It can also leave little time for school, friends or simply being young.

Older siblings often help raise younger ones while parents work. Many feel close to their siblings because of it, and some feel they missed out on their own childhood.

• Grieve the parts of childhood you missed
• Honour the strength it took
• Notice if you still take care of everyone but yourself
• Practise asking for help, little by little

• Career choices
• Dating, marriage and who you love
• Faith and traditions
• Independence and moving out
• Talking about feelings and mental health

When parents seem strict, they may be worried about safety, about losing their culture, or about whether their sacrifice will pay off. Naming the worry can soften the argument.

Questions you could ask

• “What are you most worried about?”
• “What did you hope for me when you moved here?”
• “What was it like for you at my age?”

• Ask a relative or elder to help explain each side
• Choose a calm moment, not the middle of a fight
• Speak in whichever language carries your feelings best
• Start with values you share, like family or hard work

Many first-generation parents feel they must make the sacrifice “worth it”, and that pressure can pass to their children. Wanting to make your parents proud is natural. It becomes heavy when your worth depends on it.

Some people feel their own problems don’t count next to what their parents went through. Your feelings are real, even if your life looks easier from the outside.

• Ask your parents what they truly hoped for, not just what they expect
• Find others who understand, like a cultural student group
• Remember that gratitude and your own dreams can go together
• Talk to a counselor who gets both worlds

• Feeling different at school because of food, clothes, names or accents
• Learning the language faster than parents, and being asked to help
• Missing grandparents and relatives they rarely see
• Picking up on adults’ worries about money or papers
• Switching between “home self” and “school self”

• Being told their feelings are a betrayal of the family
• Choosing between their parents’ culture and their friends’ culture
• Feeling responsible for keeping the family safe
• Interpreting bad news, legal matters or adult conflicts

Health services should not rely on children as interpreters, except briefly in an emergency.

The 2024 youth review found that support from family and friends, family warmth, pride in heritage culture and speaking more than one language were linked with less stress.

The APA notes that secure bonds with parents and feeling connected to school are linked with fewer mental health problems in immigrant youth. For Somali teens resettled in the U.S., feeling they belonged at school was linked with less depression.

The APA notes that a 1982 U.S. Supreme Court decision, Plyler v. Doe, says public schools from kindergarten to grade 12 must give all children access to education, including children without legal status.

A Pew Research Center survey found that most second-generation Hispanic and Asian Americans described themselves by their family’s country of origin or a broader group. About 37% of second-generation Hispanics and 27% of second-generation Asian Americans most often called themselves simply “American”.

• Feeling unsure is part of discovering who you are, not a failure
• You can keep some traditions and let others go
• You don’t need one neat answer to “Where are you from?”
• Your identity can grow as you grow

Your parents may not understand everything about your world, and you may not understand everything about theirs. That doesn’t mean they don’t love you. Many families find their way to each other over time.

• Ask your parents about their childhood. You may be surprised
• Find a trusted adult to talk to when home feels hard
• You can be proud of your roots and still be your own person

The APA describes research in which second-generation Jamaican American teens who connected with their heritage culture had healthier eating habits, partly through traditional home cooking.

• Ask a grandparent for a recipe and its story
• Celebrate a holiday from your heritage with friends
• Listen to music or watch films from your family’s country
• Record an elder telling a story from their childhood

Pew found that about 80% of second-generation Hispanics spoke Spanish at least pretty well, while only about 40% of second-generation Asian Americans spoke their parents’ language that well.

Speaking more than one language was linked with less acculturation stress in the 2024 youth review.

• Cultural student clubs
• Faith or community youth groups
• Heritage-language classes
• Online groups for children of immigrants

The APA describes research showing that for immigrant youth, taking part in community action can be a healthy outlet and protect mental health.

• Asian Mental Health Collective: an Asian Therapist Directory
• Inclusive Therapists: filter by language, cultural knowledge and the provider’s identity
• Therapy for Latinx: therapists who share Latinx clients’ cultural background

The APA notes that warm, responsive parenting helps immigrant children build security and resilience. The Immigrant families guide is written for parents.

Find A Helpline (findahelpline.com) lists free, confidential crisis lines in many countries. You can search by country and by topic.