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LGBTQ+ veterans

You served with courage, sometimes while hiding who you are. You deserve respect, care and a community that sees all of you.

⏱ 4 min read📑 11 sections📚 21 sources✅ Reviewed October 2026

By the numbers

What research shows about LGBTQ+ veterans and their mental health.

Who served

1 million+U.S. veterans identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender, researchers estimate (Journal of Trauma & Dissociation, 2020).
17 years“Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was in effect from February 28, 1994, to September 20, 2011 (U.S. Department of Defense).

Mental health

More stressLGBTQ+ post-9/11 veterans reported more financial strain, discrimination and hard life events than LGBTQ+ people who never served (Psychological Trauma, 2024).
More symptomsThey also reported more severe depression, anxiety and PTSD symptoms, but were not more likely to get most kinds of mental health care (Psychological Trauma, 2024).

MST

22.7%of bisexual, pansexual and queer veterans reported military sexual trauma in a national survey (LGBT Health, 2023).
17.0% vs 6.5%of gay and lesbian veterans reported MST, compared with heterosexual veterans (LGBT Health, 2023).
Being LGBTQ+ is not the cause of these struggles. Stigma, hiding and mistreatment are. Those can change, and support helps.

LGBTQ+ people who served

Two kinds of stress, and a lot of strength.

LGBTQ+ people have served in every branch, and researchers estimate more than a million U.S. veterans identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender. Many served with pride. Many also served while hiding a big part of themselves.

LGBTQ+ veterans can carry the same stresses of service as anyone else, plus the stress of stigma. Rejection in the military and the legacy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” have been linked to minority stress, isolation, and reluctance to seek VA care.

🪖 Military stressDeployments, danger, loss and leaving the military.
Read more

Like all veterans, LGBTQ+ veterans may live with combat stress, injuries, grief or the hard landing of civilian life.

Veterans: coming home & life after service and Veterans: PTSD & combat stress cover these in depth.
🧱 Minority stressThe weight of stigma, hiding and discrimination.
Read more

In interviews, LGBTQ+ veterans described discrimination and put-downs from fellow service members, other veterans, therapy group members and even health care providers.

LGBTQ+ mental health explains minority stress and how to cope with it.
💪 Strength and prideMany LGBTQ+ veterans are proud of serving.
Read more

Serving well while carrying extra pressure takes real courage. Many LGBTQ+ veterans speak with pride about their service and their identity, and both can be true at once.

Serving in silence: “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

What it meant to hide, and how it can still echo.

“Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was in effect from February 28, 1994, to September 20, 2011. LGBTQ+ people who did not disclose their sexual orientation could keep serving. Generally, those who disclosed were discharged.

For many veterans, that meant years of watching every word, hiding relationships and fearing being found out. Some lost careers they loved. That kind of long-term hiding can leave lasting stress.

🎭 The cost of hidingAlways on guard, even off duty.
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  • Changing pronouns when talking about a partner
  • Feeling you could never fully trust your unit
  • Missing support during hard times, like a breakup or loss
  • Keeping friends and family from different parts of your life apart

Being on guard for years can feel a lot like hypervigilance. It makes sense if relaxing or trusting still feels hard.

📄 Discharged for who you areA loss of career, income and sometimes benefits.
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Some service members were discharged because of their sexual orientation, sometimes with a discharge that wasn’t honorable. Shame and anger about that can last decades.

There are paths to benefits and to upgrading a discharge. See “Discharges, upgrades & benefits” below.

🕰️ Old memories later in lifeHiding can resurface with age, news or loss.
Read more

Older LGBTQ+ veterans may have served under these rules or before them. News stories, anniversaries or the loss of a partner can bring those years back.

Older veterans and When PTSD shows up years later talk about memories that return later in life.

Mental health: what research shows

More stress and symptoms, and a gap in getting care.

A national study of post-9/11 veterans compared LGBTQ+ veterans with LGBTQ+ people who had not served. The veterans reported more financial strain, divorce, discrimination, and seeing the sudden death of a friend or family member.

LGBTQ+ veterans also reported more severe depression, anxiety and PTSD symptoms. But they were only more likely to get therapy for PTSD, not other kinds of mental health care. The researchers said this suggests unmet needs, especially for depression and anxiety.

🚧 Why care can be hard to reachPast hurt makes people wary.
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LGBTQ+ veterans have described mistreatment in military and health care settings. Those experiences can make people reluctant to seek care, even when they need it.

Common worries

  • “Will they judge me?”
  • “Do I have to explain my identity before I can get help?”
  • “Will my information be kept private?”
  • “Will they understand my partner or chosen family?”
🌱 Support that helpsConnection and identity-affirming groups.
Read more

A VA-developed 10-week group for LGBTQ+ veterans, called PRIDE in All Who Served, focused on identity, military culture, connection and speaking up for your own health. In an early study, veterans reported fewer depression and anxiety symptoms and less suicidal thinking.

Availability of groups like this has varied after recent policy changes, so ask what is offered near you.

Depression, anxiety and PTSD are treatable. You deserve care that treats you as a whole person.

Military sexual trauma & LGBTQ+ veterans

Higher rates, real fears, and free care.

In a national survey of U.S. veterans, military sexual trauma (MST) was more common among sexual minority veterans. About 23% of bisexual, pansexual and queer veterans and 17% of gay and lesbian veterans reported MST, compared with about 7% of heterosexual veterans.

Among veterans who had experienced MST, sexual minority veterans were much more likely to screen positive for PTSD. The researchers pointed to the added weight of minority stress.

Fears survivors may carry

  • Being outed by telling someone
  • Not being believed, or being blamed
  • That the harm was tied to who they are
  • That providers won’t understand

MST can happen to anyone, of any sexual orientation or gender. VA offers free care for conditions related to MST, and you don’t need to have reported it at the time.

The Military sexual trauma (MST) guide has a full section on every survivor, plus planning to tell someone and healing at your own pace.

Discharges, upgrades & benefits

You may be eligible for VA care and benefits, even with a past discharge.

VA says it has taken steps to make sure former service members discharged because of homosexual conduct, gender identity or HIV status have full and fair access to benefits. In 2024, VA removed a regulation that had been used as a bar to benefits, and encouraged people who were turned down before to apply again.

🏥 Apply for VA care and benefitsA discharge that isn’t honorable doesn’t always close the door.
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When someone with an other-than-honorable discharge applies, VA reviews their record. Over 10 years, VA provided care or benefits to 75% of these former service members, more than 57,000 people.

VA’s review is only about VA benefits. It does not change your military discharge.

⬆️ Request a discharge upgradeThe military boards can change your discharge.
Read more

You can apply for a discharge upgrade by mail or with help from a Veterans Service Organization. VA’s online questions give you step-by-step instructions, the forms you need and the right board’s address.

The Department of Defense has shared “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” resources, including how to appeal for an upgrade and answers to common questions.

🧑‍⚖️ Get free helpYou don’t have to do the paperwork alone.
Read more

Veterans Service Organizations can help with upgrade applications. VA’s benefits line is 800-827-1000, Monday to Friday, 8 a.m. to 9 p.m. ET.

Understanding VA benefits & claims and Veterans: getting care & support explain the steps in more detail.
In a mental health emergency, you can go to any VA medical center, whatever your discharge status. The Veterans Crisis Line is for everyone who served.

Getting care that respects you

What VA says now, and how to speak up for yourself.

VA policies on LGBTQ+-specific programs have changed in recent years. In June 2026, VA renamed its LGBTQ+ Veteran Care Coordinators as “care coordinators” who serve all veterans, regardless of characteristics including sexual orientation. VA’s memo also said all veterans must be treated based on clinical needs and without discrimination.

Because programs can keep changing, the best step is to ask your local VA or Vet Center what support is available now.

🗣️ Speaking up for yourselfYou can ask for what you need.
Read more
  • Ask how your information is kept private
  • Bring a partner, friend or chosen family member to appointments
  • Say if a provider’s words or questions feel disrespectful
  • Ask to see a different provider if it isn’t a good fit
  • Write your questions down ahead of time

The “Questions for respectful care” worksheet below can help you prepare.

🏘️ Vet Centers & telehealthOther ways in.
Read more

Vet Centers offer free, confidential individual, group, marriage and family counseling in a relaxed, non-medical setting. VA also offers telehealth, so you can talk to someone from home.

🌈 Care outside VACommunity providers who are LGBTQ+-affirming.
Read more

Some veterans also see LGBTQ+-affirming counselors in the community, through other insurance or local LGBTQ+ centers. It is okay to ask a therapist about their experience with both veterans and LGBTQ+ clients.

LGBTQ+ mental health has a full section on finding affirming care.

Transgender & nonbinary veterans

Recent changes at VA, and support that continues.

In March 2025, VA announced it would phase out medical treatments for gender dysphoria, with limited exceptions for some veterans already receiving care. VA said trans veterans remain eligible for comprehensive VA health care, including preventive and mental health care.

Changes like these can bring worry, grief or anger, on top of the stresses of service. Those feelings are understandable, and you deserve support with them.

💬 Mental health care continuesCounseling is part of comprehensive VA care.
Read more

VA says eligible veterans who identify as trans will continue to receive comprehensive VA health care, which includes mental health care.

Talk with your VA provider about what is available to you now. Vet Centers also offer free counseling.

🤝 Community and peersOthers who understand both worlds.
Read more

Connecting with other trans and nonbinary people, and with veterans, can ease isolation. Online and local groups can help when in-person options are few.

Trans & nonbinary mental health has more support, including peer helplines.

Pride, community & chosen family

Finding people who see both your service and your identity.

Social isolation adds to the risk of depression for LGBTQ+ veterans, and connection helps. A group of people who understand both military life and being LGBTQ+ can feel like coming home.

Places to find your people

  • An LGBTQ+ community center that welcomes veterans
  • An LGBTQ+ veterans group, online or in person
  • A peer support group for veterans
  • Pride events or veteran groups that march together
  • Volunteering alongside other veterans
🏡 Chosen familyThe people who show up for you.
Read more

Many LGBTQ+ people build a chosen family of close friends, partners and mentors. For veterans, this may include people you served with who knew the real you.

Let your care team know who your support people are, whether or not they are legal family.

🎖️ Pride in your serviceBoth parts of you belong.
Read more

You don’t have to choose between being a veteran and being LGBTQ+. Telling your story, in your own way, can help others who are still hiding feel less alone.

LGBTQ+ mental health has more on community, chosen family and building pride.

Being an ally to LGBTQ+ veterans

What family, veteran groups and providers can do.

👨‍👩‍👧 Family & friendsAcceptance is protective.
Read more
  • Believe them about who they are
  • Ask about their service, and about their partner or loved ones
  • Don’t share their identity with others without permission
  • Keep inviting them, even if they pull away sometimes
🏛️ Veteran groupsMake it clear that everyone who served belongs.
Read more
  • Say plainly that LGBTQ+ veterans are welcome
  • Speak up when jokes or comments put people down
  • Include LGBTQ+ veterans in events and leadership
  • Know where to point people for support

LGBTQ+ veterans have reported discrimination from other veterans and in group settings. Welcoming spaces can change that.

🆘 If you’re worried about suicideAsk directly, stay close, and call together.
Read more
  • Ask: “Are you thinking about suicide?” Asking does not put the idea in their head.
  • Help put time and distance between them and firearms or other means during hard times.
  • Listen without judging their identity or their story.
  • Call the Veterans Crisis Line together: dial 988 then press 1.
Helping someone who may be suicidal has more on getting someone through a crisis.

When and where to get help

Signs it’s time to reach out, who to call, and help outside the U.S.

Reach out if…

  • Memories, nightmares or feeling on edge won’t ease
  • You feel hopeless, ashamed or very alone
  • News or policy changes are taking a heavy toll
  • You are drinking or using more to cope
  • You have any thoughts of suicide or of hurting someone
🇺🇸 U.S. lines to saveCrisis support and Vet Centers.
Read more
  • 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988
  • Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741
  • Vet Center Call Center: 1-877-927-8387, 24/7
  • Veterans Crisis Line: dial 988 then press 1, or text 838255
LGBTQ+ mental health and Trans & nonbinary mental health list LGBTQ+ helplines.
🌍 Outside the U.S.Find a free helpline in your country.
Read more

If you served in another country’s forces, your country’s veterans’ agency can tell you what support exists. Veterans: coming home & life after service lists lines in the UK, Canada and Australia.

Findahelpline.com lists free, confidential helplines in many countries, searchable by country and topic, including LGBTQ+ lines.

Veterans Crisis Line: dial 988 then press 1, text 838255, or chat at VeteransCrisisLine.net. It is free, confidential and open 24/7 for every veteran, whatever your discharge status. If a life is in danger, call 911.

📝 Worksheets for this guide

Fill these in privately in the app. Your answers stay on your phone.

My story of serving as meReflect on what serving was like for you, what you carried, and what you want now.
Questions for respectful carePrepare for an appointment so you can get care that respects all of you.
My people & my prideMap the people who accept you, and one new place to find community.
🔒 Fill in privately in the Mentally United Wellness App. Free, no ads, no accounts.

Sources

  1. Lange, Hilgeman, Portz, Intoccia & Cramer (peer-reviewed) (2020). Pride in All Who Served: Development, Feasibility, and Initial Efficacy of a Health Education Group for LGBT Veterans (Journal of Trauma & Dissociation)
  2. U.S. Department of Defense (now Department of War) (2023). DOD Highlights ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ Resources
  3. Harper, Blosnich, Livingston et al. (peer-reviewed) (2024). Trauma exposure, mental health, and mental health treatment among LGBTQ+ veterans and nonveterans (Psychological Trauma)
  4. Webermann, Merians, Gross, Portnoy, Rosen & Pietrzak (peer-reviewed) (2023). Military Sexual Trauma and its Association with Mental Health Among Sexual Minority and Heterosexual Veterans in the United States (LGBT Health)
  5. Livingston, Berke, Ruben, Matza & Shipherd (peer-reviewed) (2019). Experiences of trauma, discrimination, microaggressions, and minority stress among trauma-exposed LGBT veterans (Psychological Trauma)
  6. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, National Center for PTSD (2026). Military Sexual Trauma
  7. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (2024). VA expands access to care and benefits for some former service members who did not receive an honorable or general discharge
  8. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Request a discharge upgrade or correction
  9. Military Times (2026). VA eliminates gender identity initiatives, reclassifies LGBTQ+ care coordinators
  10. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (2025). VA to phase out treatment for gender dysphoria
  11. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Vet Centers (Readjustment Counseling)
  12. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. VA Mental Health Care
  13. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, National Center for PTSD. Peer Support Groups
  14. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Helpful VA Phone Numbers
  15. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Veterans Crisis Line
  16. Veterans Crisis Line (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs). Signs of Crisis
  17. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
  18. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
  19. Crisis Text Line. Crisis Text Line
  20. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). Crisis Text Line
  21. Find A Helpline (ThroughLine). Find A Helpline

This guide is for education and self-care. It is not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional care. Please talk to a counselor or clinical provider about your health. Reviewed October 2026.

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