Rebuilding after big setbacks

Housing

Recovery

Some setbacks don’t end when the news moves on. Losing your home, your savings, your business or your sense of safety can take months or years to recover from. This guide is about the long rebuild: practical steps, and how to keep your mind steady along the way.

Other guides that can help

• Debt, bills, shame and calling lenders: the Debt & financial hardship guide
• Losing a job and looking for work: the Job loss & job hunting guide
• Resettling after war or fleeing home: the War, conflict & displacement guide
• The first days and weeks after a disaster: the After a disaster: what to do guide
• Getting ready for the next emergency: the Being prepared: emotional & practical readiness guide

Long after the news crews leave, survivors may still be dealing with rebuilding, insurance, new schools and new jobs. SAMHSA notes that it takes time to grieve and rebuild individual and family lives.

Research after Hurricane Katrina found some mental health problems grew in the year after the first survey, linked to housing and money stress that was still going on nearly two years later. Getting your life back is part of mental health recovery.

SAMHSA says the memorial date of a disaster can renew fear, anxiety and sadness, sometimes for weeks or months beforehand. Smells or sounds, like smoke or sirens, can bring it back on any day.

Birthdays and holidays can be especially hard for families displaced by a disaster, particularly with money strain or temporary housing.

Ideas for marking the day

• A community memorial, vigil or rebuilding day
• A family meal or ritual to honour what was lost and what survived
• A quiet day off, if that’s what you need
• Prayer, meditation or a spiritual service
• Volunteering or donating, if that feels good

Losing a business, a job, savings or a home can feel like losing your identity and your future at once. SAMHSA notes some survivors can’t regain their previous standard of living, and lost income can lead to unpaid bills.

SAMHSA suggests talking with a financial professional, who may ease the feeling that you have to manage it all alone and connect you with resources.

First steps when everything feels gone

1. Cover the basics first: shelter, food, utilities, health
2. Call 211 for local emergency help with housing, food and bills
3. List what you owe and to whom, without judging yourself
4. Call lenders early and ask about hardship options
5. Replace key documents, starting with ID
6. Ask for help from family, faith communities and local charities

When you lose your home or belongings, you may also lose the papers that prove who you are. Many agencies ask for one official document, like a birth certificate, before they replace others, so start there.

Most disaster advice assumes an ending. But for many people, hardship is ongoing: never enough money, unstable housing, unsafe neighbourhoods, one crisis after another. That kind of stress wears people down.

Disaster research shows that ongoing stresses after an event, and worn-down support networks, are strongly linked with worse outcomes. Chronic hardship works the same way: the stress never gets a chance to settle.

Coping when hardship is long

• Find people in the same boat. Shared struggle is lighter
• Focus on what you can control today, even if it’s tiny
• Keep one daily ritual that’s just for you
• Notice your strengths: getting through hard days takes skill
• Use free community resources without shame: libraries, food banks, parks, faith groups

On a single night in January 2024, 771,480 people in the U.S. experienced homelessness, the highest number since counting began. HUD noted that disasters, like the Maui fire, added to the rise.

A 2024 federal report says the root causes of homelessness are lack or loss of affordable housing or income. In a large California study, the most common reason people gave for losing housing was lost or reduced income, and 89% said they struggled to get out of homelessness because they couldn’t afford housing.

The same report says homelessness more often triggers or worsens mental health problems than the other way round, because it adds acute stress, uncertainty and trauma.

SAMHSA says that with good social support and coping skills, most disaster survivors are able to recover and are quite resilient. Ready.gov encourages focusing on your strengths and accepting help from your community.

Resilience doesn’t mean you weren’t hurt, or that you should be grateful for what happened. It means you keep finding ways forward, often with help.

Questions to reflect on

• What did I do that I didn’t know I could do?
• What matters more to me now, and what matters less?
• What would I tell someone else going through this?
• Who showed up for me, and who did I show up for?

Support networks matter. A review of research on 60,000 disaster survivors found that weak or worn-down support made problems more likely, and support often fades just when people need it most.

SAMHSA says talking with people who accept and understand your feelings is one of the best ways survivors help themselves. You can be that person.

What helps

• Check in on the hard dates: anniversaries, holidays, the first winter
• Help with forms, calls or rides to appointments
• Invite them to ordinary, fun things, not only recovery tasks
• Keep showing up months later, when others have moved on
• Listen more than you advise
• Offer specific help: “Can I bring dinner Thursday?”

Try not to say

• “At least you’re alive”, even if you mean it kindly
• “Everything happens for a reason”
• “You should be over it by now”

You don’t need to wait until things are unbearable. Reach out if stress lasts more than a few weeks, if daily life is hard to manage, or if you’re worried about someone.

Help lines (U.S.)

• 211: local help with housing, food and bills
• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988
• Disaster Distress Helpline: call or text 1-800-985-5990, 24/7, including for anniversaries and reminders
• Homeless veterans: 1-877-424-3838, 24/7

Outside the U.S.? Find A Helpline (findahelpline.com) lists free, confidential helplines by country.